
I must admit bitterly that I was hoping to dislike Sally Rooney’s latest novel Beautiful World, Where Are You. Why? Because I am a small and petty person. The social media and marketing storm surrounding her latest release was heretofore unseen in my lifetime and I wondered/doubted if it was warranted. Is this to be expected for all new novels in the future? I doubt it, but would love to see it for my own. Just saying.
My bitter bone was to be disappointed as my opinion quickly turned to admiration for a Beautiful World, Where Are You, a compelling look into the lives and more importantly the minds of millennials. Rooney’s sentence structure was different from anything I have read in the past and her use of emails between friends to move the story along while not innovative was very well done. Rooney has been described as the first standout millennial writer. I hate to categorize a writer by genre let alone by generation but I wonder if that may seem like a heavy burden to carry on a slim pair of millennial shoulders. Even ones as talented a Rooney’s. Time will tell. If her latest characters are a reflection of the stability of millennial shoulders she may want to hit the gym.
Beautiful World, Where Are You depicts the lives of two best friends, Alice and Eileen, a childhood crush, Simon, and some rando, Felix, from Tinder, as they struggle to find happiness. Their search for happiness is framed by typical millennial experiences that demonstrate just how different this generation is from any other previous generation. This will come as no surprise to the Gen Xers out there, but this generation does not think like you or experience life’s milestones in the same way. To misquote a prescient James Van Der Beek from Varsity Blues, “they don’t want your life.” But what do they want? I don’t think even they know.
Alice is a successful writer recovering from a nervous breakdown(are they even called this anymore?), Eileen also works in publishing, but as an editor for a small literary magazine, Simon is well to do and works for the down trodden(even now I don’t know what he really does, but he too has trouble describing his job to others), and finally there is Felix. Felix, the Tinder rando, works in a nameless warehouse, that seems a lot like a dig at Amazon, and is unhappy with his job but doesn’t seem inclined to change his situation. No one is happy. But why?
In between serious discussions of world politics, climate change and what the definition of “working class” really is(hint: it doesn’t mean that you work for a living) this group struggles with unhappiness and loneliness to such an extent that I had to ask myself, why ARE millennial so unhappy and so lonely?
The standard issue responses are as follows: technology ruined their social skills, helicopter parents arranged playdates so they never learned how to make friends on their own, they’ve inherited a broken climate, economy, world and the real big one is their reluctance to engage in or maybe a better word is the loathing of traditional marriage. This reluctance to participate in what they consider a broken and irrelevant institution has deferred and for some excluded the option of a family. Those who do marry are waiting until much later in life than previous generations. So for now many millennials find themselves going through life’s milestones alone where in the past, people their age had already partnered up and started families.
This repudiation of the traditional idea of marriage is stated over and over again in the novel and yet Eileen jokes with Simon that he needs a wife to take care of him and have dinner waiting on the table when he comes home from a hard day’s work. Contrary to our past generational gendered expectations Simon refuses this archaic view of domesticity in favor of a more equal partnership while Eileen is the one who is pushing for it and dare I say longing for a reoccurring role on Real Housewives of the 1950’s. The cognitive dissonance is palpable and revealing all at the same time. Eileen is against the idea of marriage but still longs for the stability and happiness she has been taught that it brings. How as a society can we change these ingrained patterns of belief? Are millennials reacting to the bad marriages of their parents while at the same time having internalized the happy marriages of films and sitcoms and are now unable to find their own path that reflects their own beliefs and expectations that are relevant to the world they live in now and not the world of their grandparents?
The real issue here is that millennials are just the latest generation to want it all and not know how to get it and while in my opinion they are closer than ever to finding a solution to relationship equality they can’t seem to get out of their own way. We can’t overthrow hundreds of years of traditional gender roles and expectations in one lifetime, no matter how much progress we’ve made there will always be the double dealing specter of a simpler and better times lurking in the shadows. There is an allure to the notion of the 1950’s perfect housewife that is dangerous to everyone. A comfortable home, 2.5 adoring children, a loving partner that provides for you everything you need and want sounds great, but our grandmothers will tell you that other people’s happiness is never what it seems and that submission comes at a cost. Your freedom and your independence aren’t worth the comfort of your allusions of a better time.
For the characters in the book, loneliness and unhappiness comes from a refusal to see what life is really about. There will always be big global problems and yes we should do our best to change the world for the better, but in the end we need love and friendship to make sense of our existence. Otherwise what is the point of solving global warming if you have no one to share the experience with?








